Although you can now get retirement speeches ready-made on the internet, you run the risk of giving a retirement speech that is, well, generic. If you really want this speech to fly, you need to call upon your own personal experience, whether the subject of the speech is you or a friend of yours. Go back through old letters, photo albums, journals. Talk to friends and associates to find just the right story that will make a truly personal and unique retirement quote or funny incident that makes the best retirement jokes.

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